Life can be a little difficult, old chap

Life is really hard. I'm learning that horrible things will happen no matter how hard you try to avoid them. So you just have to accept this and move on.

I've found myself thinking about a hand full of people that I need to disassociate myself from. I guess most people in their lives will come across others who are nasty pieces of work, or perhaps simply not compassionate enough to realise that you have feelings too. Sometimes you may not even realise this for quite some time.

I must be crazy, because I've found myself continually trying to win these kinds of people over, instead of spending more time with friends who actually give a damn about me. I'm being very cryptic aren't I. Well it's because I don't want t name names, even though it doesn't really matter. Some of these people don't even know each other. I'm not making much sense, I thought this would be easier to write, but I'm struggling.

So anyway there are these "friends" who I speak to but they never speak to me. Not literally (usually), but they'll never actually ask me how I really am, or anything about me.

... Fuck this, I'm just going to say it, it's the people in my class at uni. Are YOU someone from my class? Well you know what? GOOD! Because you can read this and know how I really feel. I would love to have you come up to me and ask me why I wrote this. But you know what, I don't think it'll happen, because I don't think any of you will read this. So ok, why am I pissed? I'm pissed because you don't know me. You don't know me because you don't ask me anything that's about me. Do you know anything about me apart from that I study animation, my names Oliver (you may not even know my surname), and you've probably kinda heard that I like video games?

Anything else? No. I ask you questions though, have you noticed? You rarely even bother to answer me. I don't just ask "how are you?", I ask what have you been doing? What are you doing? What kinds of things do you like? What do you do? What is your job? What are your hobbies? What music do you like? And loads of other stuff that is the foundation of a proper friendship. I don't know much about you lot though because you rarely answer me with anything more engaging that "yeah", or "waeva". If you actually are one of these people, you're probably thinking it's because you simply don't like me. Well fair enough, but I don't think you've given getting to know me much of a chance to come to that conclusion. You barely know me, how can you think that. Some of you don't even notice I'm there, I speak to you and you totally blank me. Why don't you actually try to find out something about me? Instead of being so self-centered? Some of you seem to think that I'm some kinda lona that doesn't have any friends. But no, actually I have fuck loads of friends who are far nicer and more interesting than you. They respect me and listen to my opinions and actually take them into account. I was just trying to be friends because we study together, but I can't be bothered anymore, it's a waist of time.

So I'm going to stop neglecting my REAL friends by seeing them more often (I've said this before, haven't I, oops). I'd like to point out that I'm not talking about everyone in my class, some of them aren't actually dicks.

I've also been upset by another person recently. I did in fact write some slightly pissed off stuff about them right here, but I just deleted it because we made up. So it would be unfair to leave comments about how I thought they treated me like a soulless robot :P I have to accept that some people have problems which are better left untouched by me. Instead of trying to help them, which can turn into something more akin to stoking a fire and making it worse. But then again, my methods were terrible, so I will try better ones next time, and with less gusto.